Hey there, King. If you’re reading this, it may be because you decided to pipe down on a search engine and seek out answers to the question that you have.
So, your wife wants to have a threesome. How wonderful and damn, it looks like you’re lucky enough to be experiencing what is a fantasy for most men. Right?
But maybe you’d like to wait a bit, and not just go on ahead without thinking it through. Threesomes are fun, and such a taboo that they could help you actually help in bringing back that spark you seek to feel in your relationship with your wife. Sex with the same person, same routine, and positions day in and day out can become quite tedious, as you can probably imagine.
Your wife might be looking for a way to bring back both of your respective youths, make you look at the world’s colors a little brighter and perhaps have a more fulfilling orgasm. I mean, we all want that extra at the end of a fulfilling session, do we not? I know I do, at least.
So here’s the thing. If you’re the guy who suggests this to his wife and she acquiesces, after what was probably the best sweet-talking you might have had to do in the course of your doing, congratulations.
You’ll need to access and be careful with going on to try this adventure because you do not want to hurt your wife or find yourself unable to breathe anymore after the deed is done.
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MY WIFE SUGGESTED THIS THREESOME WITH A MAN.
Well, looks like we might have a problem here. Call the boys, time for a campfire talk.
I’m the boys, by the way. Just to be clear.
So, here’s what we need to do in such an event. You could do with a deep breath, and from there we walk through this together.
First and foremost, you might want to stop being as excited or down as you are, depending on which spectrum of emotions you might fall into, and think about the most important thing here: her motives.
Why does your wife want to have sex with another man?
It would do you both a lot of good if you didn’t assume why she wanted this. She’s bold and trusts you enough to admit to having what remains a mere fantasy for the overwhelming majority of couples out there. So many women would just go on to cheat, wouldn’t they?
So this could mean that as much as she wants that experience, she wants it with you and that counts for something. In fact, could be said to be the most important thing.
You both need to talk. You need to sit in the most comfortable and honest place in your home, and discuss her motives, why she desires a threesome, and if it may be possible to keep it at just a fantasy.
But of course, that’s only if you do not want it as well.
Why does she want this threesome?
It could be a lot of reasons, but let’s look at the most likely reasons. Remember that the first rule of police investigations is that: The most likely possibility or suspect is the one who did it.
It’s as simple as that. There is absolutely no need to go all Sherlock on her ass. (Pardon me.)
For one, it could be that she just wants to try out one of her deepest fantasies, and feels she may never get to it because she is married to you. Perhaps she thinks you enough of a friend to tell, and that’s great, isn’t it?
Another reason could be that she was probably a fun-going, life-of-the-party type of girl before you two got married. It would be thoughtful for you to consider and perhaps ask if this is something she may have done before and just misses. When you look at it, she must have spent this time being married to you, happy and satisfied.
If anything, it would be worth it to give talking it over a shot, see if there really is a need to go through with the experience. You could both find out other ways to bring excitement and passion back into your relationship, without the need for a third party.
By the time these options have been considered, you may have both found a way and reached a decision. To continue with looking for the right person for the experience, or you could both let it go, knowing that in dealing with the aftermath of the sexual encounter, you may both find yourselves with feelings and a situation you never accounted for. But we will get to that.
This brings us to the next thing to talk about: Who is the third person, and what are her feelings toward this person?
When it comes to this point, it would be best to take it a bit more seriously and look for honesty in your partner.
You will want to find out from her if she has any particular person in mind. And you might have to feign being open to the idea at first, as well as let the understanding that she will have the final choice, as she obviously must find the third person pleasing.
If to the contrary, then things may not be as feared. However, if it does happen that she has someone in mind, there might be a problem.
Why that person, and does she have feelings for them? These are things to be considered and of course, no man would like to hear this sort of thing from his woman.
You’d probably feel a burst of rage, and that’s okay.
One thing to note is that if you do eventually decide to go ahead with it, you’d be sensible to ensure that the third person comes far removed from both of your individual lifestyles. It would be awkward to see the man or woman that you have a threesome with, every other day, wouldn’t it?
So co-workers are out, neighbors and of course, friends are off-limits when it comes to experimentation.
In the eventually that you both decide on a stranger, you will have to ensure that you both agree to the following:
- The person is not an immediate friend or lives where your lifestyles demand that you come in contact with each other.
- You three take health seriously, get the appropriate tests done.
- Use a condom. There’s no sense in playing it risky. At all.
- Make sure that contact with the person ceases after the deed is done. I used Deed because you need to understand one thing:
You are the main characters in this exciting adventure, and should not try to make someone else as important as you both are.
- Of course, make sure that the third party consents, and is pleased with every development as you go.
- The only result that comes from including a friend or co-worker in this private and personal part of your life is complications and more complications.
How to go about it?
While no two sexual encounters are ever the same or have the same experiences. You can’t walk into a bookshop and pick up a How to Threesome handbook, so I can’t teach you how to do that.
However, there are a few tips you would probably benefit from knowing, going into this.
- Make sure to know that everyone enjoys what is happening.
- Have a way out. Let all parties know from the onset that they could back out at any time when it becomes uncomfortable, even in the heat of things.
- Make sure you both understand that ill feelings could develop, and your relationship might get strained. If you both don’t have absolute control of your emotions, it would be best to keep this a fantasy and find something else.
- Have clear rules beforehand on what each person is willing to try, or not.
For instance, are you both ready to see another man or woman be that intimate with your partner? It might be worth giving that thought as you go forward.
When all is said and done, the matter remains simply that this topic will always be controversial and there is no clear-cut answer. You have to find a way that works for you, and doesn’t end up straining your marriage or partnership.
When taking such a huge step (And having a threesome with a stranger while married is definitely one!), you should be careful and make sure that all parties can find a way to be happy both short term and long term. You do not want to trade the safety of your marriage for an event that will last merely a period or phase of the marriage.
Finally, if you two do decide to go on ahead and do it, make sure that you have fun! That’s what counts!
