So you feel that your man is cumming a tad bit fast in bed? Mostly this is a general case of anxiety but sometimes it could mean something much deeper.
With my years of experience with several men, I’ve listed 7 basic rules on why this could happen. Check em out and assess yourself!
It’s been a while since he got laid
If you’ve been dating for more than a few months and haven’t made it to the bedroom yet. Or, if he hasn’t been seeing anyone after getting out of a long-term relationship, you might find that he needs to build up some stamina when it comes to playing his cards in the bedroom again.
This obviously isn’t something to be worried about though, as it shows that he’s chosen not to sleep with random girls and that he’s committed to you. But it is highly likely that you’ve probably already spoken about past partners and relationships, so he may have hinted at some point that it’s been a while since he was last intimate with a woman.
More often than not, he may also be upfront afterward, apologising for how quickly he finished and telling you it’s been a long time. This will soon improve though, as the more you both have sex, the more his stamina will grow and the more likely that he will start lasting longer before you know it.
It’s a compliment to how attracted he is to you
When our men finish before we expect them to, we obsess over the idea of “when a guy comes too fast what does it mean” when actually, it could just mean that he is really, really into you! Think about it for a moment, have you been imagining him in bed and what it will be like? Well, he’s certainly been edging himself thinking about this moment of getting you into bed.
Which means, when it does happen, it can easily be overwhelming to him, meaning he finishes too fast. Yet this only happened because he’s so into you and thinks you’re gorgeous. So, you should always take premature ejaculation as a kind of compliment before you take it personally. He’s just really turned on by you!
This problem shouldn’t last too long, though. Indeed, after the first couple of times, you’re both together, you should see him start to improve. If he doesn’t, it might signify that there are other problems involved.
He might have a condition causing it
While premature ejaculation can be experienced by men at any time, when it happens frequently during sex it becomes a condition that might need medical help. To try and see if it’s chronic, if he’s showing signs of ejaculation during sex, slow things down and see if that helps. If it doesn’t, it’s more likely he’ll need to go to the doctor.
Often, if there is a condition, men will not manage to make it until intercourse. Instead, he will most likely orgasm before you get by the kissing and gentle foreplay session. If he can make it past that and it’s more of an issue that he’s not lasting long enough while inside you, it’s likely that it’s more in his head.
You might be pleasuring him too much
While we often presume that when a man finishes fast in bed, it must mean there’s something wrong, it might actually mean you’re too good. As whether it’s foreplay or oral sex, if men are finishing too quickly, it might just mean that you need to slow down.
Think about it, when a man orgasms, he is completely letting go of his control. So, if you want him to stay focussed and make your sex last longer, take your hand off the ignition and slow it down. You’ll soon find that things are lasting longer and you’re feeling satisfied again.
He could just be a selfish lover
It’s easy to think that when men finish early, it’s a problem that needs to be fixed. However, you might be surprised to know that sometimes finishing fast doesn’t have anything to do with a physical or mental barrier. Instead, it all comes down to men that are selfish lovers.
To spot if men are selfish in bed, think back to what happens during sex. Does he just skip foreplay and go for the main event without any thought for making sure you’re ready for him? Worse still, he will likely just pound away at you until he reaches orgasm, without even thinking about returning the favour to you.
If this sounds familiar, it’s likely your man doesn’t have a problem – he’s just really selfish when it comes to sex. In which case, you could do so much better.
He’s just not that experienced
When it comes to sex, experience isn’t everything. However, for men, experience can really help in order for them to last longer. As they’ll learn ways that they can distract themselves and slow everything down during sex. For instance, you might have heard of some men who try to do multiplication sums in their head to keep them from finishing too fast. Without this experience, though, many men will find themselves getting far too excited and losing control. Which is why you’ll often see movies and TV shows that will show virgin men lasting less than a minute.
Don’t fear though, if your man is inexperienced, he can improve. Simply take your time with him and walk him through everything that you like in the bedroom. It won’t take long before he’s learning everything you like and last far longer than he did in the past. Indeed, you might even turn him into the perfect lover!
You’re not changing sex positions enough
While as women we think of changing sex positions as a fun way to shake things up and receive more pleasure, for men this is often a necessary change to ensure they last longer. As, when men change position it gives them the chance to calm down and keep going.
Just think, when you’re with your guy, does he go hard and fast in one position and end up finishing fast? Well, if you want to stop this, wait until you think he’s close and then move into a new position. You might even want to put yourself on top, as this will allow you to be in control and to set the pace a little more.
Not only will changing positions a lot help your guy to last longer, but it will also make sex even more exciting for you both. You could even make a game out of it, where you both look to introduce new and wild positions to your bedroom antics.
If your guy is finishing too fast, it doesn’t matter if he’s finishing after one or two minutes or it’s just too quick for you to reach orgasm – either way, you have every right to feel annoyed and dissatisfied with your sex life. Before you decide he’s a terrible lover and you’ve got to get rid of him, though, you should give him a few chances. As sometimes your guy can just feel pressured or he might be too excited by you and what you’re doing.
So, give him a few chances and see if it’s just a case of early nerves. You’ll no doubt find that he’s soon lasting longer than he was in the beginning. If his premature ejaculation continues, though, it could be that he needs either some medication or to talk to a therapist. Thankfully, this condition can be treated – you just need a little patience. It will be more than worth it when your guy is back to being a sex machine!